what to do when....

Last night was a horrific night for me.
I was full of excitement as I prepared to pay for an instructor training. I started to share with someone my grand plan of how I wanted to start teaching Turbo Kick (the group fitness version of Turbo Fire) and then I stopped. Just that quick, like a band-aid being ripped off your knee, I stopped talking just that fast.
Someone who I love and value very dearly who I thought had always supported me in the journey squashed my spirit for about 12 hours. I won't tell you who it is, like Beth Moore says, it wouldn't bless you to know that information. I was told by my loved one that I shouldn't and couldn't do it. I was given a whole list of reasons -
-Not physically ready
-Have you put in the work
-You don't like to stick things out
-My kids take up so much time
-You have a hard time finding ways to get stuff done around your house (s/n *truly I tell you, my house is not a disaster, but I also choose to "pick my crazy" so I don't have an immaculate house - it is what it is, some day I will but not with 4 kids under 8 - its just not going to happen and I have come to be okay with that)
-How will you manage your kids' activities if you are doing your own?
And the list when on and on a little longer but the conversation only went on for about 10 minutes before my will to keep trying would have just ran out. I was angry and I went to bed with my plan right out the window. I cried a little and then fell asleep.
Last night's conversation really challenged me. I felt like yeah, I know I still hover around 200 lbs but I also know I have kept off 60 lbs for two years and during a pregnancy. For the sake of all my hard work and determination, I had to list all of my accomplishments.
I'm not writing this to vent, although it is a little therapeutic to verify again that I am strong and I have come a long way. I am writing this because you need to know that when someone cuts you down, makes you feel little in confidence (and in my case large in body) - you need to have an attitude that will learn from it.
I have decided to restructure my plan to make it indestructible. I am delaying when I wanted to take my training class but I will be better for it and I am jam packing my schedule with me time for workouts and me time for self development so when you take my Turbo class, I will be the most bad-ass teacher you have had (aside from Julie D and Chalene herself!)
Today I joined a kickboxing gym - a extreme fitness gym and vamped up my home workouts! I wrote out an eating plan for three months and designed one for my kids too. I wrote out calendars for my kids, for child care and my own schedule and I will not fail. I will prove everyone wrong, especially said person who gave me the ammunition to design a way better plan than before that is foolproof and they can eat their words later.
Its all about your attitude. You can get sad or you can get strong.
-Kayla-