obsessive

honesty is the best policy, right!?

i hate food. i hate exercise and i hate fitness. and its only cause i LOVE it. i get totally consumed by it. its my empowerment and my kryptonite .

i get obsessive with calories, with workouts and with what goes into my mouth. one time it got so out of hand i sat in my kitchen and i cried. im in a kitchen full of healthy food and i was afraid to eat. even last night, i was so upset that i treated myself to thin crust pizza with my kids. they should know there is a healthy balance to everything, but i just beat myself up all night about it. i didnt even have a soda, just water, and only four small squares. weird. i know. and to my kids, im sorry.

my husband doesnt understand it but he tries. i know it stems with some eating issues as a teen and a body issue that comes from being told your over weight by family members your whole life. being asked if you want to be fat, being told you look just like their fat selves -- it all adds up in a growing psyche.

point of this point, as much as i love to build people up, i struggle too! i am just like you. i have my own battles with weight from being depressed and gaining too much weight to losing weight and once i see change, i get so worried and consumed about what i am consuming and how many calories i am burning.

i am working every day on finding a balance, i am here to help you do the same. together we can conquer any problem. together, as a group of healthy, fit friends, we will succeed in our goals and feel proud - if we do it together!

Happy Saturday!