life is more than fitness

I often write about my struggles or accomplishments in fitness, but lately my heart has been tugged to write about the thankfulness of the blessings I have received in my life as a parent. My husband was put on a really grueling and time consuming schedule for the last few months and it has been really hard to parent alone. Often times, feeling so overwhelemed, I have said things that I didn't mean at all and God forgive me for those shortcomings and sins. I was questioning God a lot! Where were my blessings for doing the right thing? Where were my rewards for making hard choices that changed my life? Where were my gifts for forgiving hardships in my marriage? Why can't God just help my children behave?!

I conceived my first child when I was seventeen and my then boyfriend, now husband, knew that abortion was never an option. We considered adoption for a long time, but ultimately I knew I could never live with not knowing if a family would be good to her. We kept our baby. Our pastor's wife prayed with me every Sunday after church - we prayed for a lot of aspects that were going to change in our life once Rylee came. Let me tell you, friends, God answers prayers and when He does, he does it in a mighty way. John had all but signed the papers to join to ARMY to take care of us, We found out his boot camp would begin the very week I was due to have our daughter. He postponed signing and swearing in and explained why to his recruiter and in the mean time John had received news that he was getting a job at a local oil refinery. What a blessing. My pregnancy was hard. My liver wanted to not work right, my kidneys didnt want to work right and I had hyper-emesis pretty bad. Despite all of that, Rylee was born a healthy and alert baby girl. Perfect in every way. What a blessing. John's new job made it so we didn't have to be on welfare anymore and I could stay home. What a blessing.

Our second child was an absolute horrible pregnancy. I ended up with a PICC line to give myself potassium infusions and steroid shots to ensure her lungs would be developed. The doctor knew she was going to come early. (What a blessing!) Reagan was born at 33 weeks. She was perfect! We were in the NICU for only three of the seven weeks that they anticipated. What a blessing. She didn't need to come home on a monitor or oxygen like many babies do. Reagan does not have a single ailment related to her premature birth. WHAT A BLESSING!

Ryan's entire existence is a miracle! Ryan came all on his own at 36 weeks. The hospital did not want me to deliver, but Ryan had other plans. Ryan was a blue as a blueberry when he entered the world. Myself and a lot of concerned family members would ask the nurse if it was normal and every time we were told yes. We were discharged and home. At Ryan's well check, he had lost more weight. We were told to enjoy the holiday weekend and come back for a weight check. (it was fourth of July weekend) Before the holiday weekend my daughter had to go in for a visit. A Muslim doctor who doesn't normally have residents with her noticed his odd breathing but assumed it was periodic breathing and was about to brush it off but decided to use it as a teaching moment. Upon listening, she realized Ryan was holding his breath longer than he should have been and she decided to order an pneumogram to be safe. (BLESSING! AND PROOF THAT GOD WILL USE ANYONE TO DO HIS WORK!) Ryan had his pneumogram that night. The nurse came to pick up the test gear but left the apnea monitor with the instructions to keep it in case he needed it. NOT TO KEEP IT ON HIM. As we were getting ready to leave for an over night vacation with family, another nurse called to see if the equipment had been picked up and I had just a few questions for her. In our conversation, the new nurse told me that monitor should have NEVER been taken off of him! (HELLO MIRACLE!) While at a cottage with family, Ryan's monitor kept going off but we didn't know what that meant but we did know it meant we weren't going to stay over night anymore. We didn't want it to keep everyone awake. So we left. (God has an amazing way of putting you where you need to be!) Sunday morning, John went to give our car to the youth pastor so they could use it to carpool on a mission trip. During that time he received a call straight from the home of our pediatrician and she said take Ryan to the hospital immediately! So we did and that began his eleven month journey with oxygen and an apnea monitor. It was one of the most scary times in our lives - ever. The first hospital we took him to allowed him to be off his oxygen THREE TIMES and his tiny body couldn't handle it. He needed the help breathing and consequently we ended up back in the hospital. Our pediatrician sent us to a second hospital (SUCH A BLESSING!) and the doctors there ran tests and made a plan and made sure that we were comfortable with the plan. They listened and they got Ryan off of the monitor and oxygen when it was safe for him - not when most babies don't need it anymore. I could not love Dr. Cohn more - he saved by baby's life! I wish he was still practicing so I could tell him how grateful we are to him. Ryan is now three and they told us this was the time that he would show signs of cognitive delays. We were warned that since his body was deprived of oxygen - his brain may have been affected. But we prayed for healing, and God is faithful. Ryan shows NO SIGNS of any delays. He is smart, He is witty. He is all boy! God gave me so many blessings during this time!

After Ryan was finally on the mend, my husband and I wanted to have another baby right away. We wanted them close in age. So we tried for a long time, and unlike the rest, nothing happened. I had learned I had some medical stuff that made it amazing that my babies turned out okay as it was - and I probably wouldn't be able to have anymore. We decided to be okay with that decision and sold all of our stuff. Then the following March, I learned I was pregnant with baby Reid. My pregnancy was smooth, it was full term and while he didn't always like to cooperate for non-stress tests and ultrasounds, it was rather uneventful - like it should be and unlike the previous three. Reid was perfect. God gave us a beautiful baby boy and he is the final piece to our family puzzle. He is smart and bright. He likes to talk about da-da a lot. It totally can make John's day and me a little jealous; but - I am thankful.

I have friends who have lost kids. I have friends whose babies are sick and yet I was complaining and being so angry at my kids. I have to confess, I had mean thoughts and I couldn't always keep them to myself. I am thankful for a God who forgives and gives me a new day to try harder and be better. What was I thinking to question my blessings or when was it going to be my turn to have the things I wanted? Did God not provide a good job so I could stay home and healthy kids to enjoy? Wow, my perspective was way to worldly and I needed to take a step back and reevaluate life. My house is small, but God blessed me with it at 19 years old so I could raise a family that He kept healthy. How narrow minded had I become to forget to see the big picture around me.

Life is more than your hobbies, your job or your wants. Life is more than how good your kids behave and they are more important than the grades they bring home and the chores they do or maybe do not do. I needed that reminder. God blessed me with four beautiful kids. He saved them and he protected them and I was mad at them and quite frankly, I needed an attitude adjustment. I was being ungrateful and mean. What the heck. Writing this has even been more helpful to remember all the times God has said, HELLO. I am here and you ARE so blessed and favored.

If nothing else from this read, you have been able to see a small snippet of my life and how God has totally moved in it! I just had to share my heart.

Help!

Im injured and I can't get up!

It's no secret to my friends and family and most of my followers that I am injured with a messed up Achilles tendon issue.. I have been referred to an orthopedic surgeon to look over the injury and make a final verdict for a plan of action. It's good and bad. I have mixed emotions about it. I know I am going to be severely delayed in my plans, but I know if I don't get it taken care of, my goals could not happen - period.
At my last appointment, my doctor shared with me that it very well could have been my weight that caused the injury. I know I am probably sensitive to this or just frustrated cause I feel like I am capable of doing more than my body will let me. I am too fat to workout hard, the way I like to workout. I am too fat for kickboxing, for running (even the treadmills shake when I go over 5.0) and its like the world and now my body is saying, you are too fat to GET SKINNY!
I just feel like. WHAT. THE. HELL!?
I sulked for a few days and my foot hurt like hell. I tried to be more busy here and my foot hurt even more. Finally, my husband, and voice of reason, told me that I just had to take it easy. And I just started to cry. I brought up surgery because it's becoming clear to me that I can't do this on my own. I always thought I could, but apparently, I can't. I am STILL so frustrated I could cry. I begged him to let me look into a bi-lateral sleeve or a gastric bypass. And then I cried myself to sleep when he said no because he knows I can do it.
Friends. I am in a not so good fitness place. I KNOW I can do it, but in the most literal sense, my body won't let me. My husband is trying to be encouraging and uplifting and yet I want to scream at him because he just doesn't understand the stress and frustrations I feel over this kind of stuff. My biggest fear is to be 260 lbs again and without being able to workout, I just can't get it out of my mind that its going to happen.
Has anyone else been here? I feel like so much of the fitness community has only been mildly over weight and I am still, despite losing 50+ pounds, am still consider morbidly obese.
I am trying to take it back to the basics. I am trying to just take it one day at a time, one meal at a time, one small light workout at a time, one small goal at a time and I am just PRAYING that they add up - you too?

part of the club

Like many other people, on Tuesday nights i love to watch Extreme Weight-loss on ABC. This past Tuesday I watched a man lose 180 pounds and he still didn't qualify for skin removal surgery and what he said has stuck with me since. He said, "I feel like I got kicked out of a club that I never really belonged to."

Fitness is not a once size fits all. It's not a one way fits all. It is surely not exclusive and we would all be better off with it.

To the man in that show, despite how you feel with your accomplishments but not hitting your goals, you belong. To the woman who is a celebrity trainer and helps millions, you belong. To the dad who works out after work, you belong and to the woman who is just beginning her journey by walking her dog - you belong.

This club has the ability to feel exclusive. It has the availability to be harsh and mean and discouraging. I am here to tell you, get with the right people.

I remember when I started Turbo Kick and everyone in there was so fast, and so slim, and could follow cues and I would think, "what am I doing here?!" And I didnt reach out for help and I didnt reach out for friends and I remember hearing that the instructor was part of a fit girls clique. I remember feeling sad and frustrated!

I refuse to let anyone feel that way. It is not okay to make someone feel bad for wanting to be better than they were the day, or month, or week, or year, or hour before!

Today I felt the nearly 200 pounds of my body holding me back. I did my fave class Turbo Kick and then I did a hardcore kickboxing class at another gym. And in both instances, my fat got in the way. (please don't say I am not fat. I am, but I have learned it doesnt define me) As luck would have it, during the kickboxing class, I was paired up with the wife of another instructor - who had badass-ery mastered. She was amazing. She was pregnant and still kicking butt! She could have taken one look at me and said, NOOO THANKS. But she too believes that the fitness club is all inclusive. She helped me perfect my stance, reach further with my strikes and punches and she cheered me on - and I tried my best to do the same for her.

So chin up all you people who are trying your best to be the best you. Who are trying your best to get weight under control, to manage stress through fitness, who are trying to perfect that shoulder and round that bum - we all have different goals but we need to be inclusive. We need to invite people to be healthy and we need to encourage them to keep trying, keep perfecting, and STOP giving up!

You ARE part of that club.

obsessive

honesty is the best policy, right!?

i hate food. i hate exercise and i hate fitness. and its only cause i LOVE it. i get totally consumed by it. its my empowerment and my kryptonite .

i get obsessive with calories, with workouts and with what goes into my mouth. one time it got so out of hand i sat in my kitchen and i cried. im in a kitchen full of healthy food and i was afraid to eat. even last night, i was so upset that i treated myself to thin crust pizza with my kids. they should know there is a healthy balance to everything, but i just beat myself up all night about it. i didnt even have a soda, just water, and only four small squares. weird. i know. and to my kids, im sorry.

my husband doesnt understand it but he tries. i know it stems with some eating issues as a teen and a body issue that comes from being told your over weight by family members your whole life. being asked if you want to be fat, being told you look just like their fat selves -- it all adds up in a growing psyche.

point of this point, as much as i love to build people up, i struggle too! i am just like you. i have my own battles with weight from being depressed and gaining too much weight to losing weight and once i see change, i get so worried and consumed about what i am consuming and how many calories i am burning.

i am working every day on finding a balance, i am here to help you do the same. together we can conquer any problem. together, as a group of healthy, fit friends, we will succeed in our goals and feel proud - if we do it together!

Happy Saturday!

lets be real

today i had yet another encounter with someone who supposedly supports me but has fallen through for me. i relied on someone to be with my kids so i could attend a workout at a new place that i want to join, unfortunately when six o clock rolled around, they were no where to be found. in fact, they were over a half hour away and ignored the previous call that was to remind them about an hour prior to when i needed them.

no one is looking out for you
no one will be what you need them to be 100%
sure they will give encouragement
sure they will cheer you on
BUT
unless you are willing to only rely on your own motivation and your own drive, you will get no where. other people can only take you so far. until you want it with everything you got - people like the above will just be another road block and excuse and will stop you from reaching your goals.

make a list of why you want your new body.
your new job
your new car
your new friends
your new lifestyle
your new mentality
your new outlook on life

study that list EVERY. DAY. Then work your ass off for it and it may take some jumping, some maneuvering and some crawling and maybe even some crying - but damn it. as long as you want it as much as you breathe. you will get there.

what to do when....

Last night was a horrific night for me.
I was full of excitement as I prepared to pay for an instructor training. I started to share with someone my grand plan of how I wanted to start teaching Turbo Kick (the group fitness version of Turbo Fire) and then I stopped. Just that quick, like a band-aid being ripped off your knee, I stopped talking just that fast.
Someone who I love and value very dearly who I thought had always supported me in the journey squashed my spirit for about 12 hours. I won't tell you who it is, like Beth Moore says, it wouldn't bless you to know that information. I was told by my loved one that I shouldn't and couldn't do it. I was given a whole list of reasons -
-Not physically ready
-Have you put in the work
-You don't like to stick things out
-My kids take up so much time
-You have a hard time finding ways to get stuff done around your house (s/n *truly I tell you, my house is not a disaster, but I also choose to "pick my crazy" so I don't have an immaculate house - it is what it is, some day I will but not with 4 kids under 8 - its just not going to happen and I have come to be okay with that)
-How will you manage your kids' activities if you are doing your own?
And the list when on and on a little longer but the conversation only went on for about 10 minutes before my will to keep trying would have just ran out. I was angry and I went to bed with my plan right out the window. I cried a little and then fell asleep.
Last night's conversation really challenged me. I felt like yeah, I know I still hover around 200 lbs but I also know I have kept off 60 lbs for two years and during a pregnancy. For the sake of all my hard work and determination, I had to list all of my accomplishments.
I'm not writing this to vent, although it is a little therapeutic to verify again that I am strong and I have come a long way. I am writing this because you need to know that when someone cuts you down, makes you feel little in confidence (and in my case large in body) - you need to have an attitude that will learn from it.
I have decided to restructure my plan to make it indestructible. I am delaying when I wanted to take my training class but I will be better for it and I am jam packing my schedule with me time for workouts and me time for self development so when you take my Turbo class, I will be the most bad-ass teacher you have had (aside from Julie D and Chalene herself!)
Today I joined a kickboxing gym - a extreme fitness gym and vamped up my home workouts! I wrote out an eating plan for three months and designed one for my kids too. I wrote out calendars for my kids, for child care and my own schedule and I will not fail. I will prove everyone wrong, especially said person who gave me the ammunition to design a way better plan than before that is foolproof and they can eat their words later.
Its all about your attitude. You can get sad or you can get strong.
-Kayla-

fat shaming... ew and UGH!

So in the last year I was pregnant, delivering my 4th beautiful and healthy baby. And unlike the last three - this time taking off the weight has been much harder and the kicker is I gained the LEAST amount of weight with my little guy. Im not sure if its been that he is number four- the tubal that I had after or just not putting myself first... But I do know I am still trying, still lifting and still working out -- which is whats leading me to this blog. 

I HATE people who fat shame. Fit or Fat - thick or thin, I cannot stand that anyone thinks they have a privilege or right or even carries the audacity to tell say negative things about people.

Last night at my church's VBS, while playing dodge-ball tag, a fellow volunteer tagged me with the ball. Now, I have had a target on my head with the kids, and of course the adults all play - but the words that came out of her mouth cut me and hurt bad - Im still struggling to shake it. She followed up with "I wanted to pick a slow person."

I don't know this woman very well, and Im not even 100% sure she meant it malicious or not, but what I do know is I wanted to yell at her all of my stats

- I have done more 5k runs than I can count on my hand.

- I ran a mud run with my fitness coach at SIX MONTHS PREGNANT

- I have increased my weights by 15 lbs since my baby's birth

- I can run faster, longer than pre baby

and so on and so on

I wanted to say why do you think I am slow, because I am bigger? My heart felt like the fat girl I was in elementary who never got asked to play sports first and who the kids taunted on the playground in a game of chase. My heart relived the countless moments when my mom would tell me how I was just like her now (fat) and how my older sister is just like her when she was younger (very thin) and then would follow up with how much she hated herself. Which I thought meant I should hate myself. It brought me to the 8th grade girl who started throwing up so I could fit into my sisters size 2 (and i did it) and struggled all of high school to maintain a size 7. 

So to the person who snickers in the gym at the "fat" kid, to the person who doubts your ability to run, and to the person who thinks they are better. Shame on you for not giving credit to the person who is just playing with the kids (who dont notice fat... we teach them that... keep that in mind) or who is trying to get fit and who may just be running a little slower than you. 

Bottom line. If you are not encouraging, laughing with, and being positive with other people, your negativity is not wanted, warranted or desired. If you have nothing nice to say - SHUT. UP.

-Kayla-

If it doesn't challenge you....

So, this has become my mantra. I have been yo-yo dieting forever. Have you been there with me? You know, where you THINK you are fat, but you're not and then you really do get fat and wish you could get back down to where the prefat, but not really fat, girl is? And then all of a sudden - LIFE hits you in the face with a freezing cold snow ball so you don't forget that as we have gotten older, we have taken on more responsibilities. I dont care if they are kids, a job, a spouse, new bills - we have other things than ourselves to take care of and all the while fat girl is just longing to be prefat not really fat girl! This is me. However, I have found the trick to get back to the me both I want to be both physically and mentally.

I have my fair share of nay sayers - including my family who I don't think they even really know they are being nay sayers. You know the ones who say, "I dont know how you have time for that?!" or the ones who comment on your success of completing a 5k run, or a mud run race and their complement sounds a little like this, "I didn't think you could do it, but I am so proud of you for finishing!" I have had my kids, husband and friends all throw a wrench in a workout plan and I have definitely tried things that didn't work to make me happy.  BUT - I have found Beachbody. Please don't stop reading - this isnt about sales or really the company itself, but about the people who I have met and work with now. They are my green lights, my fit friends, encouragement and accountability!

18 months ago I weight almost 240 lbs. 18 months ago I had a baby, a toddler, a kindergartner and a husband who worked swing shift. I had family drama and I had friends who were not really friends. But I found Beachbody. Since then I have lost about 40 lbs and really discovered who I wanted to be and how I needed to get there - then I got pregnant. I had someone encourage me to make this my most fit pregnancy EVER - so I did. I worked out hard, I ran races and even completed the Dirty Girl Mud Run at 5.5 months pregnant.

Today I went to the gym for the first time post pregnancy and I saw a lot of familiar faces... and a lot of familiar bodies. All I kept thinking was what are you doing, or NOT doing that nothing has changed. Then I thought about this...

and this....

 

but mostly this!

Maintaining a good weight was hard. Not eating everything I craved was hard and getting in activity was hard - but dropping all your baby weight in 10 days was awesome. Losing 4 more lbs since baby has been awesome.  I don't normally toot my own horn, but TOOT TOOT!! It was hard work though. It took time and practice and accountability from my friends and family. I found people who who wouldn't let me give them excuses. 

I don't like constantly comparing myself to others or putting people down. It doesn't solve anything or make people feel good, but know if you aren't struggling or not feeling challenged you aren't changing. If you want change, it takes time and you need to invest in yourself. Don't be that person who has been going to the gym for ages but has nothing to show for it. That was me and for far too long. That person isn't trying. That person isn't putting in the time and that person will get frustrated and give up only to start back up. It is hard but staying the same and being unhappy is hard too.

YOU can do it. It doesn't have to be expensive or pretty but it does need to be done. Be healthy and happy. Why not you to be happy, healthy, and excited about the next challenge? Why not you too?!

What's your "Why?"

So I am not good at selling things. I never thought I would find myself in any kind of sales or marketing business, ever.  I am however, good at sharing me. I was pregnant at 17, bought a house at 19 and married at just 20 years young. I had three kids by 23 and now, at 25 I have one more on the way. Make no mistake, I am a blessed girl. But it took a while for me to get here, to where I am standing and feeling right now. 

I have always struggled with weight, but in reality, I have always had a healthier weight. Then all of a sudden, I weighted over 230 lbs. Im not sure how I got there exactly or when it really started to happen.

I let a lot of things pull me down. Jealousy, anxiety, my ideal idea of what marriage was supposed to be like (you know, what we see on TV. I was trying to be me in at one age, but at many stages in my life - a teenager, a wife, a mom, a homeowner.. you get it. I lost my "me" -- and then I gained a whole lotta ME. 

For a long time, I never felt like I had a place to fit in. I never felt a place to belong or click with any group, outside church. Even in church, I had my friends but no ministry or program that I felt like I could really belong to and get in my groove. I was still trying to pick that identity and run with it.

Through Beachbody I found my own identity again. My massive me, became my "why." Weight loss hasn't been just about a physical thing; but a mental, emotional, and inspirational thing as well. Since I have been working out, I am told I look better and I seem happier. 

Feeling better in all areas of my life is my why. When I first started working out, I felt a little selfish. I was taking the kids to the gym and leaving them in the daycare. I was getting sitters to run outside and they didn't see me run my races. But now I see I am a better mom for it. I don't yell nearly as often as I did before. The urge to get angry at spilled milk now is laughing so my kids don't worry so much. THEY are happier - and when they see kids from the gym, they get all excited and point them out.

So what's your "why"? Why do you want to make changes? I want to help you get there! Being a Beachbody coach is more than just about me or money. I get so excited when I see other people's lives changing. So why not you? WHY not you start to make the changes to make your own identity or just get healthy. I guarantee weight loss will not just change your body but you life. 

Turn your WHY into 

www.beachbodycoach.com/KaylaSki

Let me tell you a little story....

Once upon a time there was this girl. Her name is Kayla. This is what she used to look like. 

Kayla HATED what this girl looked like! There was a skinny girl trapped in a fat girls body!

One day she looked in the mirror and she hated what she saw... the scale confirmed her sadness and started her drive to be better. Now, Kayla didn't really have self esteem issues, she just wanted three things.

1. To look good naked for her husband 

2. To lead a healthier lifestyle for her family 

3. To get back to her old self. The self that felt good, always.

It was a hard transition for her to make. Kayla's friends weren't on the band wagon with her fitness goals just yet. It was hard to run by herself, to workout by herself and to eat better.. by herself. But Kayla wasn't completely alone. She had her husband and a fitness coach to cheer her on.  

After a short 5 months, Kayla and John began to race together. Completing four 5k runs and a mud run.
Her proudest moment was when she finished the survival race, her first mud run!

Slowly but surely, this was the mindset Kayla took. John could encourage here, but couldn't make her do it. Cory could push her but she couldn't make her do it.  >>>>>>>

 
 It was slow moving but she began to see big changes! She isn't the fastest, she isn't the strongest, but she continues to race and improve.

Kayla's kids now talk about Shakeology, drinking water, and being healthy all the time. They prefer fruit over treats and enjoy being outside and running around! Her fit self started to turn into a fit FAMILY.

Sometimes Kayla didn't FEEL like doing the workout, but after she did she was so much happier!

 Some days she feels like this. And it took a lot to get her goals accomplished. Kayla even dealt with feelings of guilt for putting her needs first some days. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>

 And now with a baby on the way.. She is a little worried about her fitness goals. Will she regress? Will she snap back to the "new" Kayla?

 But she remembers that this is where she came from and where she ended -- so its not time to give up yet!

Here is the moral of the story! If a busy mama can do it, so can YOU!

Push Challenge Day 2 and 3

Day 2.

List the top three things that are important to me. These things should be what the rest of my goals are centered around.

1. My husband. He was a man when we got pregnant and he stepped up to do what a Father does, support and love his child and baby momma - it has not always been an easy and exciting road, but its been real, its been loving, and its been rewarding. I want to help him be the best he can be because he pushes me to be the best that I can be. He has never put limits on what I can do.

2. My kids. They are my sun rise and sunset. They are the reason I get up in the morning and the reason I started my whole weight loss journey. I don't want to be on the sidelines. I want to be as present as possible in their lives.

3. My faith. I am a work in progress, but I am trying to prayerfully make decisions that are best for me and my family. I am trying to make a conscious effort to read and learn and know the God who sent His Son down for me.




Day 3.

Top Ten Goals for the Year -- Then name one PUSH goal that will allow all of these things to become possible

1. Diamond Coach
2. New House
3. Have more family memory making moments -- vacations, staycations, getting outside to play
4. Show affection, admiration, and appreciation to my husband
5. Finish more intense and fun races
6. Be fit and healthy by 26
7. Take away some of the financial burden from my husband -- No more car payments!
8. Lose some stress -- priorities what I want to lead and what I can just watch
9. Make my small groups a real priority -- increase in prayer and learning about my faith
10. Keep my family first at all times

My Push Goal is to CREATE BETTER TIME MANAGEMENT

I never knew

In one week, I ran/walked 20 miles.

I know to some people, twenty miles is nothing, they run miles and miles a day but this over weight heavy girl who hoovers around 200 pounds moved her butt on a treadmill and on the streets for TWENTY miles. I didn't know I could do that. No one ever told me I could do that, but one day I decided I am going to run this race and I am going to train and now I am making doubters turn into believers EVERYDAY! I am motivating people everyday and I am inspiring MYSELF everyday!
This is the first time I am surprising myself everyday and I am getting my family into it. I am so excited that my sisters are working out with Beachbody too! Really, I am excited my family just wants to be healthy.

I never knew that this phase in my life would ever be here. I never thought I would blow up like a blimp and I never lost my self esteem over it but I never knew God would put me here where I am being a coach and having people come to me and ask me how to help them! I mean seriously - me, a normal girl who faces temptation and struggles everyday - JUST LIKE YOU!

So this next week here, I already have 3.6 miles in from today and I have 14 more mandatory miles to go - I am going for 25! I want to outdo myself. I want my body to outdo my brain and I know I can do it.  I know if you wanted to do it, you could. You just have to decide one day that your drive to succeed is bigger than the moment you want to give up so you too  can say "I never knew" but you cannot say no one ever told you because I am telling you, if this girl can get fit and succeed, you can too!

want to follow me on my journey? check out www.facebook.com/KaylaInTraining and "like" my page! I am always looking for accountability partners and in return Id love to be yours too!

-Kayla-

picture this!



And we have a belly button! I cannot believe how far I have come from picture one!

Goals!

So, I think I mentioned that I joined a few challenges... here's some updates!

1. Pre Christmas challenge, I didn't win but I lost 6 lbs! I will take it!
2. I am currently in a weight loss challenge and I am down 10 lbs! Still have a little more time to go! I am going to crush it, and if I don't win, I still have already lost 10 lbs! That's 50lbs of pressure off my body every time I take a step - isn't that insane!

I have started making my fitness commitments for the year. So far I have signed up for

Glass City Half Marathon
Dirty Girl Mud Run
Color Run

Next commitments I will be making but haven't bought my bib for yet are

Tough Mudder
Survival Race
Race for Recovery


So, here's my question to you... what are you doing? What is keeping you accountable? WHO is keeping you accountable? Have you shared your goals with anyone yet today? I recently started a training accountability page on Facebook - 13 point FREAKIN' 1 in Training.. Look it up! I have 22 people following me to hold me to my work outs, to hold me to a good diet and training regiment! What are you doing to keep your goals from becoming dreams?

Challenge Me

So many of you may or may not know that I thrive on competition and accountability. I just joined another weigh in challenge two days ago - it's teams of two and winner takes home a pot of 2400 buckaroos! My partner is Christina. It's kind of funny, our relationship. A now good friend I hold dear, was once my husband first Prom Date! Funny, right? Here's a little more added humor, my daughter and her son like to hate each other... my daughter has a crush on her son! It's really crazy the people that Beachbody have brought into my life and how much I love that I am around a lot of like minded people, from faith to fitness! My challenge is 30 days, I am really excited about it! My husband is totally on board with me and I have been shoving my face full of fruit, veggies, and Shakeology and ya know that? I LOVE it. So keep me accountable guys!

I posted about my resolutions and goals for the up and coming year. I joined another personal challenge lead by Chalene Johnson. A 30 day push challenge. It really just helps you focus on your goals and create a way to get there without going crazy! I am determined. I really want it. I want to succeed in a job I really do love and I want to be present in every aspect of my children's life!

Today was Day One.
Today was an overview of what the 30 day PUSH challenge will hold. Our homework was this: think about what you would want to be remembered by, what do you want people to know you for, what principles guide you, what is your calling?
My kids. Everything I do, I do around my kids. I never want to work in a building where my kids are not until they all are in school. Until they all are so self sufficient I don't feel bad not helping them!
My faith. I try to raise my kids in church. I want them to know its more than knowing who Jesus is but believing in the entirety of Him. I could write an awful lot on the ways I know God exists and answered prayers I have seen and miracles I am watching in the making. All things are given and taken away by God and I pray that my life shows my belief in Him. I am a work in progress and I am thankful for all the grace and mercy that is shown to me, daily.
My family. There are so many times I would love to just pick up and move, but I don't. Why? My family. I don't know what I would do with out them. We put the FUN in dysfunctional! It may not be perfect, but its precious.
Service and presence. I want people to remember me and know me by my willingness to serve and be present. Not to get an atta-boy, but I want people to remember that I was a servant and tried to lead by example. I want to show success in my business because I am wanting to help others.  Did my kids see me helping others.... did they see me helping them?

This year is going to be more than just changing physically - I want it to be mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

Here's to transformation 2013. I expect slip ups, I expect triumphs and I expect success because I expect to push forward!


-Kayla-

New Year.. New Goals

Happy New Year!
Every year we have the same goals and the same ambition for about two weeks and then we fizzle out. At least I do. So this year I decided (again) this year is MY year. You know why it's different for me this time? Because I have an awesome husband who is supporting me. I have two aunt-in-laws who are on the same journeys and I have friends who want me to succeed. I have begun to do it for ME and not for anyone else. Let's recap the last few "new years resolution" failures...

Lose weight to look hot for my husband
Lose weight for my kids
Lose weight to wear skinnier jeans
Lose weight because so and so is and I am in a private competition with them... they don't know it though!

All of these things have included "for" and ended with... not me. Call me selfish or call me lazy because all of these reasons are good, legit reasons; and, I am sure great motivation for some people. For me, however, they are not. I mean I want my husband to want to show me off and I want to be healthy to be active and play around my kids more and who doesn't want to rock a pair of kick ass jeans? I do! I DO! But being in competition with someone is stupid and the minute one of the former things happens to piss you off or frustrate you - you are done! Once that one birthday cake is in your face.. these reasons didn't stop me from eating it. Here is my reason for wanting to finally be healthy...

BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO BE SKINNY STICK GIRL. I WANT TO BE A FIT CHICK. MY HUSBAND ALREADY LOVES ME! I don't have anything to prove to anyone else! I cannot and will not compare my journey to anyone. I want to do it for me! I am not comfortable anymore with myself. For the first time I do not feel like the skinny girl who is trapped in the fat chicks body.

Since July I have been on my true, focused journey and I have grown so close to my husband. My kids want to work out with me. We are going outside to play at local parks and I have made so many new friends who are like minded and support me in all my running and work out endeavours. I joined a business that doesn't push sales, they push healthy attitudes and helping people! I like sharing my results, my set backs and my goals and during my lifestyle transformation I have started 6 months ago. I am not embarrassed or ashamed of being over weight because I know where I was and how far I have come. I have reconnected with another good friend, Christina.

Not trying to toot my own horn here, but I am pretty darn proud of what the last 6-8 months have brought me!

Ran my first 5k - Glass City
Ran in the Color Run
Ran in the Survival Race (mud run)
Ran in the YMCA 5k
I dropped my mile run by 6 minutes
I lost 16 inches and 37 lbs from my heaviest starting weight
I went from a size 18/20 to a 12/14
I helped people weight totaling over 100 lbs. and over 20 inches

Not too shabby for only about 7 months time. Here's the thing, I now know I am capable of MORE. I can do BETTER! My mind, body, and soul are continually being conditioned with a positive attitude that tells me to do MORE - be BETTER... and yours should be too! So here are my newest goals or if your will, resolutions:

Fitness:
Run in the Glass City Half Marathon in April and just aim for a finish
Run in the Detroit area Tough Mudder in June/July
Finish in this order CheLEAN Extreme, Turbo Jam, Turbo Fire and begin to attempt Insanity
Be in a comfortable size that makes ME feel good
Home:
Be more organized for my kids
Take a dance class
Audition for a few musicals
Continue in my Beachbody Business and advance in rank - earning John and I all the FREE vacations I can to enjoy that husband of mine more - one on one

What are your resolutions? What's your motivation behind it? What is going to keep you on the wagon when you feel like falling off? If you are reading this, I do have a favor to ask - please keep me accountable with my journey. I am here to help you too - I am only but an email away! 2012 ended with a great beginning for me and now I know 2013 is my year!

-Kayla-

a new challenge you say?

So, as most of you know, I am a beachbody coach. (no I am not trying to sell you anything, this is just important to know for the story about my crazy night with my husband) I want to do the Ultimate Reset - a detoxing, ph balancing, taking you down to  vegan diet to reset your body, 21 day program. It is kind of a pricey program, but well worth it. My husband, the forever skeptic, tells me this morning that he has thought about it, and if I work out for two hours a day and drink one Shakeology a day. Not hard, just have to increase the workout time. I can do this! No problem. We start the reset on November 26 and will end just before Christmas. It will be good accountability.

So as my night continues, I go over homework with my daughter, get her backpack ready and settle down to watch my fave show, Once Upon a Time. My husband says, are you going to workout? I say yes and shortly after Revenge starts, I get my shoes on and put on Turbo Jam. John, ever so sweetly goes into the kitchen and puts dinner away and then I smell something... something with grease. I asked him if he ate something and I get told no. Apparently I asked the wrong question because he later fesses up he cooked something - left over pizza. Left over really meaty greasey pizza. So while I am kicking, punching, jabbing and getting my jenga on, John is eating two pieces of Ginos pizza. He then begins with the comments, reach higher, kick harder, stop doing low impact... yadda yadda yadda...

I started teasing him about his eating habits and then comes a challenge... challenge number 2! My big stinking mouth says, "I bet I can lose 20 lbs before you can!" Crap. This man can just think diet and loses 15 lbs. I know this because during my July challenge, he did! So here goes nothing. I am on another challenge. My goal is to do it before I even start my reset and really stick it to him and his fatty food eating, beer drinking self! I love you John, but this means war!

-Kayla-

Stumble

So - This past month has been a bust for me. I have gained weight back and with the crazyness of this life, it has been easy to once again put myself on the back burner. Ladies (gentlemen too), why do we do that? Why do we as women put ourselves last? Is it the whole nuture versus nature, or is it because our nature is to nuture... everyone but ourselves?

I am really good at this, getting on the band wagon and then falling off! So because I want this time to be so much more different then every other time I had yoyo'd my weight, I am determined to find out WHY my commitment comes and goes - except I dont think it comes and goes, I think I just allow myself to be on the back burner.

There are obvious reasons why we put ourselves last
1. Kids
2. Spouses
3. Prior Commitments
4. Our Jobs
5. House Work
6. Family Matters
... and the list can go on and on

As I was thinking about this list I was still thinking to myself that my reasons to keep going have got to be bigger than this! They are, my kids deserve a mom and dad who are healthy and happy and they have one of those - unfortuneately for them, its their dad and he is the bread winner of the family so he is not the one who is always there and they get me, the woman with a body complex. Have I passed that on to them? Do they worry about their weight? The size of their clothes? Does my first grader compare herself to the other girls in her class and feel bigger? Does she know that she is on the charts perfect and in the eyes of her momma perfect? My three year old is perfect. My 16 month old is the silliest kid I have ever met and the three of them are the biggest gift from God I have ever recieved.

How did I get this way? Kids don't grow up comparing themselves to other kids unless its about how fast, what toy they have, what vacation they went on for spring break. You get the occasional bully on the playground who calls you fat, points out the zit - but we all know its that person too who has the insecurities that are taught.

Gosh, you know, I was going to tell you about my childhood and how things transpired that maybe led me to where I am, but the more I think about it the more I feel like its an excuse. I mean I do believe you are taught selfimage, and I had some unfortunate things lead me to believe I was fat and it was a horrible thing but YOU ARE NOT YOUR PAST! I AM NOT MY PAST!

So here I am, needing to get back on board with my journey. Thankfully I haven't gained it all back, but a gain in itself is frustrating to me. I have worked too hard to go back! (I have bought too many smaller pairs of jeans too!) I need to keep journaling, keep working and inspiring myself and others. If I can do this, so you can.

Im back BABY!

Dear Parents

This one is for you. It was like an epiphany for me! Why do we go the gym and pick up McDonalds on the way for the kids to eat? Why do I drink organic milk but give my kids store bought. Why do I pass on the box mashed potatoes but give my kids extra?
WHY ARE WE NOT TREATING OUR KIDS BODIES THE SAME WAY WE TREAT OURS?

My kids eat healthy. They love their fruit and vegetables. They love chicken and steak. They also love their chicken nuggests and french fries. I don't eat it but I will allow them to. Why? Why do we run through the drive thru for our kids (or spouses) and then come home to make something for us?

Let me be perfectly clear, I am not parent bashing - I am GUILTY of doing this.

I was thinking about all the changes I have made to lose my 30+ pounds in the last year. I cut out junk and added a lot of fresh produce. When my kids ask why I am eating squash and zucchini with my baked chicken - I say to eat healthy. When they ask why I didnt get the Mcdouble when I got their happy meals, I say to be healthy. Why dont I be a parent and say no? Why is something not good enough for me going into my child's belly?

I have found that kids will eat what you give them. They will eat what you teach them to eat. My girls are beginning to LOVE salad. They are beginning to LOVE raw veggies and fruit. They are starting to NOT ask for McDonalds and request water over juice. Healthy begins when you are young

-Kayla-

Biggest Adventure yet! BEACHBODY COACHING!!

Hello! I have recently embarked on a new journey - I am working for Beachbody as a Coach! I am really excited about this opportunity. It will allow me to share what I have learned and help others achieve the results I have achieved during my own Beachbody Challenge!

Not sure who Beachbody is? Beachbody is the company responsible for putting out workout programs such as Hip Hop Abs, Turbo Jam, Brazilian Butt Lift, Yoga Booty Ballet, Turbo Fire, ChaLEAN Extreme, p90x and Insanity. Beachbody is a wellness company who developed Shakeology and sell a variety of other suppliments to meet your body's needs.

Shakeology is a completely natural wellness shake. Use it as a recovery drink like my husband, or use it as a meal replacement like me - you will feel the benefits from it very quickly. Its all natural ingredients allow your body to have more energy, less cravings and feel satisfied long after drinking your shakes! The shakes come in multiple flavors and you have the choice for them to even be Vegan approved! For more information and to hear doctor's comments, head over to www.shakeology.com/kaylaski.

As I had mentioned above, I joined Beachbody in July as part of a 30 day challenge! It was a fast month of working hard, enjoying shakes and checking in with my other challenge mates for support and ideas to keep going. There were only 10 rules to follow during this challenge!
10 Challenge Group Commitments:

1. I will follow the program.
2. I will drink Shakeology once a day.
3. I will positively engage with the small group.
4. I will log my workouts in WOWY Supergym.
5. I will not over train.
6. I will share my activity.
7. I will share my physical results.
8. I will share my emotional and social results.
9. I will finish.
10. I will pay it forward.

During my challenge I used ChaLEAN Extreme, losing 6 lbs in 30 days (1.5 lbs a week!) and 12.5 total inches off my body. These programs work. I will not promise you that it will be easy, but I know they work! For more about my journey you can visit my weight loss journey blog at www.fatgirlshred.blogspot.com.

In September, I am starting my very own Challenge Group! My rules will be few and we will work mostly through social media. Beachbody offers different Challenge Pack varieties that include your workout program and Shakeology at a discounted price.

Kayla's 8 Challenge Group Commitments

1. I will follow my chosen program.
2. I will drink Shakeology once a day.
3. I will engage with the small group - sharing activity, physical, emotional and social results.
4. I will log my workouts in WOWY Supergym - it's a free chance to win $MONEY$.
5. I will send in my photographed weight to my coach on the designated days.
6. I will finish my challenge.
7. I will log in and track my food at www.myfitnesspal.com or on the myfitnesspal app DAILY
8. I will pay it forward.

If you are interested, when you sign up for a Challenge Group, you can join yourself as a Beachbody Coach for FREE. There is a monthly fee to continue being an active coach. If you are active duty military, you can be a coach for FREE with all monthly fees waved as well! All coaches will get 25% off all products too!

If you want to learn more about Beachbody or their products, visit me at www.teambeachbody.com/kaylaski. There is no time like the present and you can achieve results any age! Are you ready for the challenge?